Unsweetened Lou Piniella

I hope David Phelps goes into the Hall of Fame as a Yankee. Nice little debut for the right-hander…

via Swept: Yanks shut out by Rays | River Avenue Blues.

I heard that the last time the Yankees started 0-2 (2009) they won the World Series. Today, I read that the last time the Yankees and Red Sox both started a season 0-3 was 1966 when they went on to finish in second-to-last and last place.

But never mind about that.

The YES announcers — a revolving revue of never-good, though-sometimes-charming nitwits — are a frequent target of spiteful and sophomoric comment in my house; but Lou Piniella’s arrival in the broadcast booth bodes ill if any sense of decorum is to be maintained.

For instance, during the season opener, Piniella actually counseled that pitchers should endeavor to get outs. After he set that gem in place, he tried polishing it. After a run scored, he observed cheerily, “That’s why it’s important to get outs.”

On Sunday, Piniella pronounced David Phelps to be “nervous” for his major league debut. Naturally, but Phelps coolly threw his first two pitches for strikes, struck out his first batter and induced a weak grounder to his second. Inning over.

I have warm, if degraded, memories of Piniella as a player, but the most vivid picture — apart from this abysmal announcing — was etched at a Cubs-Mets game two years ago, where I saw him waddle out to the mound, his pot-belly protuberance giving him the appearance of an angry pregnant woman stumbling out of a double-wide trailer.