Two-Word (Revised) Farewell Speech

Good riddance.

Four-Word Farewell Speech
Good riddance, you prick.

Eight-Word Farewell Speech
Good riddance, you prick. And don’t come back.

Sixteen-Word Farewell Speech
Good riddance, prick. You know, we assume, we’re going to miss you. But don’t come back.

Thirty-Two-Word Farewell Speech
Prick. Don’t come back. But, seriously, we’re going to miss you. I don’t know how we’ll replace your diligence and wisdom. You were such a bastard, I don’t know why we’d try.

Sixty-Four-Word Farewell Speech
Prick. Don’t come back. We’ll miss you. But we’re not going to replace you. You did some good things while you were here. That’s not what we’ll remember you for, of course, but I could list a few of them right now, I’m sure. The problem is I am running out of words, so I will end with this: The door is that way.